I just noticed something curious. Now, my parents and I don't really show affection. I don't know if this is my fault or theirs, but I am willing to assert that it's probably all of us. My mother's best friend has mentioned to me that mom is not very affectionate or touchy, and that she sees that in me too. But when I was a kid I personally put a stop to kissing my father goodbye. I was about 12 and I just said "no. I'm done with that." My parents are affectionate with each other of course. They kiss, mostly not in front of me, but I see it, certainly. But not with me, we just simply don't do that whole thing.
A few months ago I drove my father to the airport. When I dropped him off and gave him his bags, he gave me a hug before I left. I was oddly touched. It made my eyes tear up, or if not exactly tear up, but feel that tingling pinch behind my eyes that signals tears are coming.
Tonight, and right now as I type this my eyes did the twinge thing again, before she went upstairs to bed, mom came over and hugged me, even though she was probably going to see me in the morning before I went back to school anyway. That time I seriously almost cried. And I don't know why. I am so independent and they know that, that I don't need their emotional support and I don't expect it. But for some reason these hugs have been really touching me. It's strange. For me, it's strange.
1 month ago